


Which one of the Horsemen ate your cake?

by Granddaughter_Ogg



Series: Fluffy Shorts [2]
Category: Darksiders (Video Games)
Genre: Cake, Family Fluff, Funny, Gen, as he would, of sorts, strife is being hella irksome, whodunit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-15
Updated: 2019-06-15
Packaged: 2020-05-12 06:19:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 489
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19223371
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Granddaughter_Ogg/pseuds/Granddaughter_Ogg
Summary: The title explains it all. Enjoy some family shenanigans! :D





	Which one of the Horsemen ate your cake?

It was there when you left in the morning. Tucked carefully in the back of the fridge. A small exercise in pastry perfection, all soft and juicy and crowned with sweet frosting.

The thought of it kept you going through the workday. And now it was gone.

“Which one of you gentlemen took my cake?” you asked, storming into the main room.

Your beloved Horsemen lazied around on sofas, idle like big sleepy cats, their long limbs splayed all over.

You’ve learned quite some time ago that the Four like to conserve their energy - much like predators of the animal kingdom.

Your poignant question did not shake them in the slightest.

“War, did you eat it?” you asked, leaning over the Red Rider’s face. War’s eyelashes fluttered - slowly. Really slowly.

Finally, those hazy blue peepers met yours.

“Was it made of meat?…” he asked, his breathy voice still hoarse from sleep and a bit lower than usual.

That alone used to be enough to melt your heart. But you’ve sharpened your resolve.

“Hell no!”

“Than why would I?..” concluded the Horseman and went back to napping.

Fury chuckled under her breath.

You inhaled sharply and walked over to her sofa.

“Have you taken my cake, Fury? I’m really mad right now.”

She stretched gracefully and shot you a lazy smirk. Fury could be uncannily cat-like if she wanted to. 

“If I did, I’d have enough guts to admit it.”

She had a point, damn her. You gnashed your teeth and braced yourself for more shenanigans.

“That leaves just one usual suspect. Strife, you can very well stop pretending that you’re asleep now. I know it was you.”

The gunslinger opened one golden eye - and then closed it again. 

“Strife, for fuck’s sake.”

“Babygirl, you break my heart with those assumptions.” 

“You ate my cake!”

“Maybe I did. Maybe I didn’t.” Now both of those gleaming golden peepers focused on you; Strife was mocking you openly. In a tender way, as he would. But still. 

Your hands balled into fists.

“Next time just tell me that you like it so that I can buy two”, you snarled. “Nothing kills my spirit like coming home to an empty fridge.”

“Ah, but that would take all the suspense out of our family life, now wouldn’t it?”

You sent the pointy-haired one a murderous glare.

“Was it good though?” Strife inquired, the corners of his wide mouth twitching a little. The bastard.

“Yeah. Coconut with raspberry mousse. You should’ve known if you scarfed it down!”

“Maybe Death did”, Strife claimed while rolling over.

You snorted. “Don’t be ridiculous.”

The Pale Rider wasn’t there with the others. Your little investigation found him in the adjacent, smaller kitchen. He was pouring himself some water from the tap.

Now he put the glass away and swiped a finger across his upper lip, cautiously removing the telltale trace of raspberries.

This had to remain a secret. Forever.


End file.
